The DELIGHTS of Gingerbread House construction

It's December. I had my niece and nephew for the afternoon. I thought it would be nice to make a SIMPLE Gingerbread house. You know, the pre-baked kind. No need to get all Martha Stewart and whip out the gingerbread recipe, the cutters, the icing, and so on. No...one kit, two kids and some light Christmas music in the background.

Before beginning, we set out for some lunch to bone up for the afternoon. Some coloring while we await the burgers, dogs and shakes:

Of course we had to top the meal off with a little ice cream:

Then we insisted the artwork be displayed for future diners to enjoy. And the waiter complied. Yes, I did give him a nice tip for this little favor:

both pictures, taped to the back wall for generations of other children to admire.

It was now time to "get to getting" and head home to undertake the gingerbread activity. You probably can't read the circled portion of the box below...it says "EASY TO ASSEMBLE".

Already stressed, I handed the instructions over to DP, who told us it was simple construction and to stop crying already:

Meanwhile, in FULL VIEW of DP, this girl was sucking down one of DP's family!

Nevertheless, DP chose to make sure everything went well in preparing the icing:

and the boy helped out as well:

Well, we started to assemble the house, and after waiting for 10 minutes for the icing to dry, the boy suddenly realized something:

and so we started over:

A mere 20 minutes later...and with the help of several leftover cans of olives and cranberry sauce (and a jar of peanut butter to boot)...the house took shape and HELD ITSELF TOGETHER:

and then the REAL work began:

a lot of icing, a lot of candy pieces, and a little luck helped us along:

Suddenly, we heard a crash in the background and found that Santa Claus had himself a little old accident in the village:

The kids were quite artistic and I was happy to sit back and watch their work take shape:

Check out those design lines! That window frame!

Finished Product, side one (girls' side)

Finished Product, side two (boy's side)

a daring "Aeriel shot":

A beautiful girl holding a beautiful gingerbread house: a not so beautiful kitchen:

On to some quality Lego time while awaiting parental pick up:

I amazed and stunned them with my ability to create a candy cane out of Legos. Well, OK...they laughed at me and told me it was lame:

While I was busy crafting the candy cane....

OK, fine, they are obviously better at Legos than me. Here's a parting shot as they prepared to head home:

Happy Thanksgiving to all and to all a GOOD NIGHT!

Thanksgiving day dawned warm and bright, and was I ever ready! I had already made the obligatory Butterscotch Pies the night before:

With that arduous 10 minute task out of the way, I was able to relax in the am and watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade instead. Here's my favorite float...Tom Turkey - leader of the masses being roasted, baked, barbecued and fried this very day:

The hosts below spent more time talking about why they were there than showing me why they were there. LAME. I don't give a crap how many cameramen it takes for you to film the damn Spiderman balloon. SHOW THE BALLOON:

Towards 12pm, I felt the big man about to make his presence:

Here he is! And so, at 12pm PST, Thanksgiving is officially over and Christmas is ON:

The parade over, I was unable to procrastinate any longer and concentrated all my efforts making my Thanksgiving offerings for the family table:

DON'T MOCK THE STOVE TOP. It's the perfect food, all salty and bready and I think there is some "secret spice mix" involved somehow. The end result below, after much watching chicken stock boil (10 minutes), adding bread crumbs (2 minutes), and stirring the pot (3 minutes). YUMMY!

I managed to save a few bread crumbs to serve to Ingrate Bastard as a holiday treat:

The car now loaded down with HOMEMADE stuffing, HOMEMADE pies, and other stuff (OK, I admit, the olives were not homemade), I made the LONG AND ARDUOUS 3 mile trip to the parent's house. Upon entry, I was immediately accosted by the nieces and nephews:

Bros, just hanging out waiting for dinner to start:

The smell of toasted marshmallows led us all to the table. My sister in law Misty makes wonderful yams for the holidays:

And the fun begins! Olives on fingers, a family tradition dating back to the dark ages of the 1970s. Thank god the children don't have to wear the holiday earth tone plaids and polyester dresses we did:

Look at this cutie! My niece is all ready for her meal, and able to smile for Auntie at the same time:

SOME PEOPLE don't appreciate the fine qualities of Stove Top stuffing. I won't say who:

OTHERS take the whole "photos with olives" a bit too artistically. I won't say who:

While others simply enjoy gorging on the meal:

Another Stove Top critic:

But I have my fan base still:

SOME would rather eat their fingers than dine on Stove Top:

After the loud and raucous meal came to a merciful end, I took the kids downstairs for some ornament crafts and photos while suckers....I mean others...upstairs were cleaning up the table and kitchen. Here's the cousins showing their best side:

A slightly more serious side:

The 11 year old attempted to amuse the masses with some jokes while we awaited the unveiling of the dessert table:

And then it began...the mad rush for seating and first cuts of the many pies offered. My sister's infamous "cloveless pumpkin pie", the subject of many jokes on Facebook today, can be seen next to my stunning display of Butterscotch pies:

Here's the official pie score chart:

Homemade Pumpkin Pie (cloveless) - B

Store bought Apple Pie - Did anyone have any of this pie?? I guess a C

Store bought MinceMeat Pie - as this pie disgusts me, I did not try any - F (as always)

Awesome homemade Butterscotch Pies - A plus

Since I know you want to see them again, here is a closeup of the awesome Butterscotch pies I made:

(I will admit, I had no part in making the meringue tops -store bought, of course)

SOME PEOPLE copped an attitude about the whole holiday. I won't say who:

The dessert table was filled with kids and their thrilling conversation about body parts, bodily functions, and how many of these parts they could make function unnecessarily. So I turned the camera on more innocent (for the moment) kids:

This one decided to amuse us with her most wonderful new skill. The old standby Peek a Boo!

Surprise! She is still here after all!

SOME KIDS couldn't handle too much more dessert. I won't say who:

Cute photo ahead:

While the suckers...I mean others...were cleaning up the table and kitchen again, I watched the two youngest nieces. How cute is this?

(no babies were harmed in the process of getting this photo)

This is the same expression the same nephew gave me last year for my blog:

When I managed to escape...I mean wander out casually...I headed home to my SLIGHTLY decorated home. Here's my grandmothers 7 foot 1950's Tinsel Tree:

I also bought this 10 dollar star for the front garden:

and lastly, I set up the winter scene on the bookshelf for the kids to enjoy. YES, it's for the kids. I swear.

SOME were unimpressed with my efforts. I won't say who:

HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL! Now get cracking on that shopping...some stores are opening as early as 3:00am tomorrow. I won't say who (Old Navy)....