Monday, January 12, 2009

January Trail Hiking

On Friday night, I was freezing in 38 degree weather, hunkered under two blankets, watching my favorite night time stories...Forensic Files. Peter Thomas, the narrator of this series, is the guy who talks me to sleep at night. Sick, I know. Then Sunday rolls around...a beautiful 60 degree clear and sunny day. Having already evicted the Christmas tree, cleaned up for the weekend, and checked the Forensic Files schedule for the day, I head out to a popular hiking trail along the coast.

Here is the start, nice and flat along the beach. No stinky whale carcasses today.
Some kind soul had even arranged some driftwood into a bench for a nice touch. There are a lot of people taking advantage of the nice weather. This cuts my chances of being taken by some serial killer in half.

The crows along this area are huge! They actually wobble when they walk around. You could fricassee one for gods sake! I take a photo of one and you can clearly see how big he is, as apparently a UFO is passing by in the the bird against it!!

Onward and upward, to the top of the mountain range. Since the city installed stairs and actual trails, I don’t get to see as many rescue efforts, which is kinda disappointing. On the other hand, there are a lot more people hiking to the top, which cuts my chances of being killed by a serial killer significantly. Did I mention that already? Below is a shot of the top of the mountain. See all the people sitting there? They are catching their breath after a steep climb of about 200 steps!

Here is a shot of what I refer to as "Certain Death" or "Three Rocks". Take your pick:
I think I saw this area on an episode of Forensic Files once. Something about a guy and a gal, a trail walk and "the wind pushed him over the edge, officer". Hmm.
So, later on along the trail I spot this sock:
First off, how does someone lose a sock on a trail? Secondly, this looks like a hospital sock. Was some sickly person brought up here and tossed over the side by a serial killer or uncaring family member? There are plenty of "dump areas" around here, as you can see below:
It looks pretty steep, and a lot of bodies could conceivably be down there. These are my thoughts when I see things like a lone sock on a trail.

Moving on... here is a shot of the famous "Harold and Maude" beach:
Yes, this is the hilltop and beach where Harold ran his car over the edge and onto the rocks below. I only discovered this 1970's film fact about three years ago. I was watching that film and recognized the hill and background and looked it up to see if I was right. Another good dumping site, I suppose. Not that I would know. But I watch Forensic Files.

The trails here are unmarked, so I’ll call this next photo "Two paths on yellowed trail stood...pondering one, I took the other...hoping a serial killer wasn’t on that one":

Once at the very top of the trail, I stop and look around...first thing I see is some dumb ass guy OFF TRAIL, trying to get on the "Rescue 911" show:

Then I notice that one of our trails - it’s about half mile away from me in this shot - looks suspiciously like the Lombard Street switchbacks:

On the way down the other side of the trail, I spot what can only be called..."How Thirsty am I?":
Then I take the obligatory "artsy" shot of some old ass rusty fence serving no purpose other than to give photographers something to photograph:
A last photo of the view from the top, as some creepy looking guy just passed me on the trail and he was carrying a beer, not a water bottle. Yeah, that’s a sure sign of serial killerism.
I clocked in at 2.5 miles by the time I returned to the more populated beach level. This helps tremendously with my Weight Watchers work. I am down 37 pounds now! Wouldn’t it suck if I did this trail again and after losing all the weight and everything, I get taken by a serial killer? That would piss me off.

1 comment:

The Swamp Fox said...

You really do need to cut back on the Forensic Files.